Underneath the Veneer: In Support of AAPI Intersectionality
By: Dr. Shannon Wong Lerner
At twelve years old, I stood at my Great Aunt Pearl Jean’s door dressed in all black with a “devilock” hairdo emulated from my dark punk idol, Danzig. At the time, I needed to express and try to celebrate feeling different, awkward, weird. I later identified this look as part of my queerness and androgynousness. My auntie was glamorous, delicate, always “put together,” and had a sharp tongue, and yet in this moment was speechless. Auntie had been a Chinese American silver screen actress and appeared with classic Hollywood legends, Judy Garland, Marlene Dietrich, Bob Hope, Bing Crosby, and Sidney Toler (Charlie Chan) among others.
Years later, I would see her beautiful face in a close up in the opening scene of Casa Blanca right before she glided across the dance floor. However, that day, she came off the screen to be brought down to earth as I sat with her in her living room: Eating hot pot. Laughing at her husband, my Uncle Charles and how he was asking us to scale the fish he had just caught in their pond. And how neither of us wanted to do it because we had fresh manicures.
My aunt ended up painting over my black nails with a subtle, pearly pink. As a latchkey kid from a broken home, I saw this gesture as care, attention, and the closest to physical affection from my Asian family. Being “painted over” would later become a love-hate relationship with my multiple sides as bi-racial, queer, androgynous, creative, and outspoken, and yet wanting so badly to emulate the ideal Asian woman image of my auntie on screen. I spent much of my adult life hiding underneath the pearly pink veneer of seeking approval from white supremacist, patriarchal cis-gender heteronormativity.
My coming out was a crash landing, but I’m finally ready to be who I am. All of me. I’m willing to be real with all of you. If you are AAPI, I urge you to scratch the surface of your own veneer to see who and what resides underneath. If you are not AAPI, I call for you to not put that veneer on us in the first place. May is AAPI Heritage Month, and I see it as an opportunity to celebrate AAPIs intersectionality and colorful palate of different personalities, identities, expressions, neurodiversity, ages, talents, among others! We are and can be anything we want!
Dr. Shannon Wong Lerner (she/they) is a cross-continental scholar, thought leader, keynote speaker, and DEI & communication skills trainer whose work spans across the United States, Europe, and Asia. Since 2016, they’ve brought together academic, wellness, and communication coaching and consulting expertise for a cross-cultural and cross-continental integration of innovative ideas, healthy practices, and creativity. They are the host of The Intersection: Diverse Folx Converse, programming made by and for queer people of color and gender non-conforming individuals, Communication for Diverse People, and various other programs that connect diverse people to life-work balance and communication skills.
To connect with Dr. Wong Lerner, follow them on LinkedIn, and on Instagram @dr_shannon_wl.
Where necessary, content has been edited for clarity and readability.
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